I only went to community college for a year or so, and never yearned for more. Once, when sitting and reminiscing about our youth with a few friends, I realized that I was the only one who didn't have a hankering to go back to college days. Could be that I just didn't know what I was missing. But that had never been what I wanted. I always had dreamt of being a Mom, and as hard as reality may have crashed up against the dream at times, in my heart of hearts it still was what I wanted. I'm one of those fortunate few who actually got to do what I love.
But a few years ago I was watching a movie with my kids and I saw somebody doing something that made me cry out with surprise, "he has my dream job!" It was Dan In Real Life. (I never could see what he saw in her, so that was an empty spot, but there are some really, really funny scenes in this movie.) Anyway, there he was. He was working from home as the voice of sanity in an advice column on parenting. The setting, the marriage of my two loves - being a parent and writing; draped over the couch, I sighed with true longing.
Well as amazing as that was, imagine my surprise at discovering another occupation I covet as well. While riding my recumbent bike I watch episodes of the show Lie To Me and wish I could be working with Cal Lightman, learning the tricks of the trade alongside him. He is a master at reading face and body language, and the truth or lie cannot escape his keen detection. I was a dedicated liar myself, up to a certain age. But let's not go into past history right now. Perhaps its true that we hate most those sins we have held closest to ourselves. Sitting around the dinner table with my family the other night, I shared my fantasy aspirations to become a human lie detector. My girls are quite grateful that my already delicately honed skills of perception have no further school in which to be perfected. I'd have felt the same when I was their ages, I suppose. Lucky for them Cal is imaginary.
I guess I'll just have to do my best to combine what I can into this life. That's a pretty good option, actually.